I have nothing but time. No money, no girlfriend, no fun or exciting things on my my horizon. But plenty of time.
When I was married, it was the opposite. I never had time for myself. There were the kids, the wife, the constant maintenance of house and cars and yard. Now it's just me in my little apt. And time.
I have tried to find a part-time job but with unemployment at 12% there isn't much out there. I work any OT offered at my job and I wait. I wait for time to heal me physically from the after effects of the cancer and surgery. From the emotional wounds, from the prison and solitude in which I now live. Time is my friend and time is my tormentor. And I wait.
Einstein said that time was relative, that it wasn't a fixed permanent thing. It changed according to your place in the universe. My place is behind the eight ball. And so I wait. And I hope when change does come it will bring some positives to balance out all the downs of the past year. I have time. I will wait. I have no choice.
Erich,
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your thoughts. If I may, I'd like to share some thoughts, too, which of course you are free to accept or reject ;-)
When I read your writing, it makes me think of one word; transition. It makes me think of the people who have been in your shoes and who have been 'forced' out of their comfort zone if you will, and into new territory. You are not alone with your experience, but you are alone with where you go in your mind with regard to it. The strawberry in the mud is that you are alive and well which is more than some people can say. You are able to work and in the right time for you, you will work again. Maybe you can even start your own business; you wouldn't be the first person to do that after a lost job.
You know we are all old enough now, and also young enough still, to have gained a lot of wisdom in life - and every one of us in our class has. Keep believing when change does come, it will bring positives to balance things out. Einstein's Theory of Relativity never quite figured out the quantum physics, nature of reality aspect of life - but there are plenty of scientists who, through the theory of entanglement are at the very least, questioning how our thoughts impact our future moments. We have more choice than perhaps we've ever realized before. ~*~sparkles~*~ Diane