Loneliness

  Loneliness is the hardest thing I've had to deal with these past 6 months. I have been with my ex-wife for 23 years and our 2 children are 17 [18 this month] and 12.
   I have always put them first. There was never a time when I though of myself and now I have to re-adjust. It's so hard to change and it's not any easier, really.
    I talk to the kids everyday and the youngest, Emily spends 2 nights and 2 days with me, which helps a great deal. The teen, Alison and I have gotten closer and that's nice, but of course it's not the same.
    The pain is worse than anything I've ever felt physically. Some days I don't know if I can bear it.
     I think I'm in the "sad"stage now. I've gone through denial and anger and now I just ruminate over and over about the unfairness, the sadness of it all. I wish it was a bad dream, but it is reality and I have to get over it. I know that intellectually, but the emotions rule my soul, and laugh at my attempts to come to grips with it.
    Mother Teresa once said that loneliness was the worst form of poverty and I know we're you're coming from sister, I surely do...